Saturday, November 17, 2007

MY Hobby Is To See Bubble In The Bathtub.

A new lady teacher came to teach 8th standard students.
As it was the first day, she gave her intro, and asked all the
students to introduce themselves with name and hobby.

She said, "Let's start with the boys first."

Boys start giving their intro...

First boy: "My name is John, and my hobby is to see
bubble in the bathtub."

Teacher was confused to listen but said, "Interesting.
Well, Ok. In fact, we must be honest in telling the hobby. And after all
there is essentially a child in each of us. So it's ok John. Yes next."

Second boy: "Myself Peter and my hobby is to see
bubble in the bathtub."

Teacher now got surprised and said, "Good. I like the
spirit of supporting a friend. Ok next."

Third boy: "I'm Smith and my hobby is to see bubble in
the bathtub."

Teacher: "Guys are you joking or what? Please be
sincere. Ok next."

This continues...
and the last boy stands up "I'm Harry and my hobby is
to see bubble in the bathtub."

Exhausted, the teacher said, "I don't think I will be
able to teach un-grown boys for long.
Anyway, now the girls please."

First girl: "I'm Julie and my hobby is to see birds."

Teacher: "Good. At last I got something different. Ok
next."

Second girl: "I'm Ruby and I like to collect perfumes."

Teacher "Now it's like educated grown up girls. Ok
next. You sweet girl; Yes you..."

Most beautiful girl of the class:
"Madam, my name is Bubble, and my hobby is to take bath
three times a day."

Tuesday, November 13, 2007

Mail From A Frustrated Victim Of Spamming:

I wanted to thank all my friends and family who have forwarded chain letters to me in 2007 & 2008. Because of your kindness:

* I stopped drinking Coca Cola after I found out that it's good for removing toilet stains.

* I stopped going to the movies for fear of sitting on a needle infected with AIDS.

* I smell like a wet dog since I stopped using deodorants because they cause cancer.

* I don't leave my car in the parking lot or any other place and sometimes I even have to walk about 7 blocks for fear that someone will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob me.

* I also stopped answering the phone for fear that they may ask me to dial a stupid number and the I get a phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda, Singapore and Tokyo.

* I also stopped drinking anything out of a can for fear that I will get sick from the rat feces and urine.

* When I go to parties, I don't look at any girl no matter how hot she is, for fear that she will take me to a hotel, drug me then take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in a bathtub full of ice.

* I also donated all my savings to the Amy Bruce account. A sick girl that was about to die in the hospital about 7,000 times.(Funny that girl, she's been 7 since 1993...)

* I went bankrupt from bounced checks that I made expecting the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL were supposed to send me when I participated in their special e-mail program would arrive soon.

* My free Nokia phone never arrived and neither did the free passes for a paid vacation to Disneyland.

So never send spam mails to anybody they would also feel the same as said above. So avoid spamming friends.

Sunday, October 28, 2007

What is the first thing that WOMEN do after a bad car accident?


Turn off the ignition?

NO



Get away from the car in case it explodes?


NO



Call 911 on her cell phone?


NO

Call ambulance??? ???

CERTAINLY NOT….



.

.

.

.

.

.


.

.

.

Sunday, September 30, 2007

How to make a woman happy........

It's really not difficult...

To make a woman happy; a man only needs to be :

1. a friend

2. a companion

3. a lover

4. a brother

5. a father

6. a master

7. a chef

8. an electrician

9. a carpenter

10. a plumber

11. a mechanic

12. a decorator

13. a stylist

17. a psychologist

18. a pest exterminator

19. a psychiatrist

20. a healer

20. a good listener

22. an organizer

23. a good father

24. very clean

25. sympathetic

26. athletic

26. warm

27. attentive

28. gallant

29. intelligent

30. funny

31. creative

32. tender

33. strong

34. understanding

35. tolerant
36. prudent

37. ambitious

38. capable

39. courageous

40. determined

41. true

42. dependable

43. passionate

WITHOUT FORGETTING TO:

44. give her compliments regularly

45. love shopping

46. be honest

47. be very rich

48. not stress her out

49. not look at other girls

AND AT THE SAME TIME, YOU MUST ALSO:

50. give her lots of attention, but expect little
yourself

51. give her lots of time, especially time for herself

52. give her lots of space, never worrying about where
she goes

IT IS VERY IMPORTANT:

53. Never to forget:

* birthdays

* anniversaries

* arrangements she makes
-------------------------------------------------------

HOW TO MAKE A MAN HAPPY :

1 . Leave him in peace

Wednesday, September 12, 2007

Sardar

I was standing at jalandhar station when my attention went towards a Sikh youth standing near me wearing a Black turban having a long beard and wearing a kirpan over his shirt.

After a while, one local train arrived, which was totally packed. The Sikh youth tried to alight the train but failed to do so. Just then a voice was heard from the back coach 'Sardarji Barah Baj gaye' (Sir it's 12 o'clock!)

The Sikh youth looked over at that voice maker who was a young Mischievous type of person and instead of showing any anger made a smile towards him.

The smile made was so enigmatic that it seemed as if some type of truth lies behind it. Not able to resist my temptation, I walked towards him and asked why did he smile at that person who teased him.
The Sikh youth replied, 'He was not teasing me but was asking for my Help'
. I was surprised with these words and he told me that there was a big history behind that which one should know. I was eager to know the History and the Sikh youth narrated:

During 17th Century, when Hindustan was ruled by Mughals, all the Hindu people were humiliated and were treated like animals. Mughals treated the Hindu women as there own property and were forcing all Hindus to accept Islam and even used to kill the people if they were refusing to accept.That time, our ninth Guru, Sri Guru Teg Bahadarji came forward,in response to a request of some Kashmir Pandits to fight against all these cruel activities. Guruji told the Mughal emperor that if he could succeed in converting him to Islam, all the Hindus would accept the same.

But, if he failed, he should stop all those activities . The Mughal emperor happily agreed to that but even after lots of torture to Guruji and his fellow members he failed to convert him to Islam and Guruji along with his other four fellow members, were tortured and sacrificed their lives in Chandni Chowk. Since the Mughals were unable to convert them to Islam they were assassinated.

Thus Guruji sacrificed his life for the protection of Hindu religion. Can anybody lay down his life and that too for the protection of another religion? This is the reason he is still remembered
as "Hind Ki Chaddar"
, shield of India. For the sake of whom he had sacrificed his life, none of the them came forward to lift his body, fearing that they would also be assassinated

Seeing this incident our 10th Guruji, Sri Guru Gobind Singhji (Son of Guru Teg Bahadarji) founder of khalsa made a resolution that he would convert his followers to such human beings who would not be able to hide themselves and could be easily located in thousands. At the start, the Sikhs were very few in numbers as they were fighting against the Mughal emperors. At that time, Nadir Shah raided Delhi in the year 1739 and looted Hindustan and was carrying lot of Hindustan treasures and nearly 2200 Hindu women along with him. The news spread like a fire and was heard by Sardar Jassa Singh who was the Commander of the Sikh army at that time. He decided to attack Nadir Shah's Kafila on the same midnight. He did so and rescued all the Hindu women and they were safely sent to their homes.


It didn't happen only once but thereafter whenever any Abdaalis or Iranis had attacked and looted Hindustan and were trying to carry the treasures and Hindu women along with them for selling them in Abdal markets, the Sikh army although fewer in numbers but were brave hearted and attacked them at midnight,12 O'clock and rescued women.

After that time when there occurred a similar incidence, people started to contact the Sikh army for their help and Sikhs used to attack the raider's at Midnight, 12 O'clock.
Nowadays, these "smart people" and some Sikh enemies who are afraid of Sikhs, have spread these words that at 12 O'clock, the Sikhs go out of their senses
. This historic fact was the reason which made me smile over that person as I thought that his Mother or Sister would be in trouble and wants my help and was reminding me by saying off 'Sardarji Barah Baj Gaye'

know about sikh history & its a humble appeal PLEASE dont make fun of RELIGIONS ! as every religion is as pure as urs.

"Its easy to joke on a Sardar, but It's too difficult to be a Sardar"

Monday, September 3, 2007

corporate language


"We will do it" means
" You will do it"

"You have done a great job" means
"More work to be given to you"

"We are working on it" means
"We have not yet started working on the same"

"Tomorrow first thing in the morning" means
"It's not getting done... At least not tomorrow !".

"After discussion we will decide - I am very open to views" means
"I have already decided, I will tell you what to do"

"There was a slight miscommunication" means

"We had actually lied"

"Let's call a meeting and discuss" means
"I have no time now, will talk later"

"We can always do it" means
"We actually cannot do the same, on time"

"We are on the right track but there needs to be a slight extension of the deadline" means
"The project is screwed up, we cannot deliver on time."

"We had slight differences of opinion" means
"We had actually fought"

"Make a list of the work that you do and let's see how I can help you" means
"Anyway you have to find a way out no help from me"

"You should have told me earlier" means
"Well even if you told me earlier that would have made hardly any difference!"

"We need to find out the real reason" means
"Well I will tell you where your fault is"

"Well... family is important, your leave is always granted. Just ensure that the work is not affected" means
"Well you know..."

"We are a team" means
"I am not the only one to be blamed"

"That's actually a good question" means

"I do not know anything about it"

"All the Best" means
You are in trouble"

Thursday, August 9, 2007

Airtel music in c program

This is a program in c.
output is airtel music


#include
#include
float main(void)
{
float A,Bb,D,G,F;
A = 440;
G = 780;
Bb = 461;
D = 586;
F = 687;
sound(G);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(2*D);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(2*Bb);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(F);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
sound(2*Bb);
delay(500);
sound(2*A);
delay(500);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(D);
delay(500);
nosound();
//end 1
sound(G);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(2*D);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(2*Bb);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(F);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(500);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
sound(2*Bb);
delay(500);
sound(2*A);
delay(500);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(D);
delay(500);
nosound();
//end 2
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
sound(2*Bb);
delay(500);
sound(2*A);
delay(500);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(D);
delay(500);
nosound();
//end 3
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(G);
delay(250);
nosound();
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(2*A);
delay(250);
sound(2*Bb);
delay(500);
sound(2*A);
delay(500);
sound(G);
delay(250);
sound(F);
delay(250);
sound(D);
delay(500);
nosound();
return 0;
}

Tuesday, July 24, 2007

Introducing myself..

Hi friends... I'm Bala.
I'm doing my B.E at present.
I'm new to this blogging world, wil learn soon about the whole thing..
Ok.. i dnt know wat to type..
So bye...